Well, its been a long month but felt like it was short.
Beginning of the month course started out rough the loss of my grandmother. I still miss her and when we were packing up her apartment, I still can't grasp that she is gone. I haven't broken down because I was prepared for it but I still do not believe it. I took the first two weeks off to spend some time with family and go through her things.
Andrew started his correctional officer job on the 9th. He will be on his 3rd week of the academy out at Middleton and once he graduates he will be heading off to Colorado City to report to the Wallace unit for duty. He told me yesterday "Thank You for finding me this job". He actually enjoys what he does and get to yell at inmates. He seems to be happier. Just waiting to see the pounds come down since he has to stay in shape to keep up with inmates.
I have come to a decision to leave BCBS. After 6 1/2 years I am so burned out its not worth it anymore. I am not sure what else to do but it can't be a huge pay drop. I was thinking maybe as a correctional officer as well and I have been looking at the other positions that the Texas Dept. of Criminal Justice has posted. Andrew thinks that I might not like correctional officer but then again he really doesn't know me. I want to work down in Huntsville because I find that it would be an opportunity for us to finally be able to leave Abilene. Now its just convincing Andrew to allow me to go to get settled. My friend has offered me to stay rent free and I figured that could help us out on cost. I find that when we are not together much, we do not spend too much money.
I have pulled up all our bills and we are going to have to work hard. He wants to pay off our debt soon and start saving money. I would like to have a child but then again I'd like to pay off stuff as well as when we have a child,we would be spending more money.
My sister-in-law is living with us and things are ok. We told her that it is wise that she gets a job to help her out to get to know the real world. She might be here till February as my brother plans to find a house in Virginia where he is stationed at before moving her there. We shall see how that works out.
I am only 2 weeks away from obtaining my Associate's degree. I'm still concern about Bioethics but I have faith. I'm still trying to decide about my Bachelor's and then I find out Kaplan has offered another Bachelor's that seems interesting. Its called Bachelor of Science in Fire and Emergency Management. Basically it sounds like those who coordinate when disaster strikes or something. I also was thinking maybe a Bachelors in Liberal Arts or Psychology. I'll talk to my academic advisor more. I want Andrew to attend as well if he is enjoying his job. He might like to get one in criminal justice.
Well, that is about it for this month. I hope to maybe get to go to Sea World sometime in late August or September. We shall see.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Vehicle Recap
I wanted to post a recap on our vehicles. These are the vehicles that Andrew and I have had since we met in Feb 06.
1) 96 Nissan P/U (my vehicle)
2) 05 Chevy Cobalt (Andrew's)
3) 98 Jeep Cherokee (traded in 1)
4) 88 Honda Civic (Andrew puchased)
5) 83 Chevy Chevette (Free vehicle)
6) 06 Jeep Wrangler (traded 2 & 3)
7) 96 Mitsubishi Eclipse (was mine, turned to Andrew's)
8) 07 Dodge Ram (traded in 6; mine vehicle)
9) 92 Honda Accord (free;just till we were able to sell it)
10) 03 Chevy Avalanche (Andrew's vehicle, sold after three months)
11) 08 Toyota Scion XD (obtained a few days after sold #10)
12) 83 Jeep CJ7 (swapped #7 for, sold after a year)
13) 09 Honda Shadow Aero (our first motorcycle)
Our next vehicle we plan on leasing from here on out since we go though them real quickly.
1) 96 Nissan P/U (my vehicle)
2) 05 Chevy Cobalt (Andrew's)
3) 98 Jeep Cherokee (traded in 1)
4) 88 Honda Civic (Andrew puchased)
5) 83 Chevy Chevette (Free vehicle)
6) 06 Jeep Wrangler (traded 2 & 3)
7) 96 Mitsubishi Eclipse (was mine, turned to Andrew's)
8) 07 Dodge Ram (traded in 6; mine vehicle)
9) 92 Honda Accord (free;just till we were able to sell it)
10) 03 Chevy Avalanche (Andrew's vehicle, sold after three months)
11) 08 Toyota Scion XD (obtained a few days after sold #10)
12) 83 Jeep CJ7 (swapped #7 for, sold after a year)
13) 09 Honda Shadow Aero (our first motorcycle)
Our next vehicle we plan on leasing from here on out since we go though them real quickly.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Thursday, July 9, 2009
A week has passed...
...since grandma has passed. I really have not thought about it but I know she is no longer here. I guess I still do not want to accept it. I am basically going on as if it is another day and I just have not called her. Its like a dream, and I just can't seem to wake up. Is she really gone? I just received a card and plant from work and I appreciate it course it still has not sunk in. I do not know why, I was there at the viewing. I felt her cold skin, I saw the coffin close, and I was there when we were at the gravesite. What else am I suppose to do? I'll just continue on till I either break own, or see what happens on Oct. 24 when she is not there to celebrate her 83rd birthday.
Anyways, I will be returning to work next Monday. I have to fix so that tomorrow is covered. I have been looking for another job. I have ideas, but then again I am not sure. I have been at BCBS for 6 1/2 years now and I am afraid I will not be able to adapt. I have heard from others who have left that they are happier because of less stress or either they are experiencing stress but it is different. I have had the last two weeks off and I guess I have not really left relax since I know I have to return to work. Maybe something will come up later.
Andrew started his new job as correctional officer today. We will find out later when he returns what orientation is like. I am excited and hope he enjoys this. He deserves to be the one brining in the most $$ to support us. Well, its over 100 degrees outside and I know I should be doing something but I do not feel like it. I'm going to go chow down on some strawberries and sugar. Hahahaha.
Anyways, I will be returning to work next Monday. I have to fix so that tomorrow is covered. I have been looking for another job. I have ideas, but then again I am not sure. I have been at BCBS for 6 1/2 years now and I am afraid I will not be able to adapt. I have heard from others who have left that they are happier because of less stress or either they are experiencing stress but it is different. I have had the last two weeks off and I guess I have not really left relax since I know I have to return to work. Maybe something will come up later.
Andrew started his new job as correctional officer today. We will find out later when he returns what orientation is like. I am excited and hope he enjoys this. He deserves to be the one brining in the most $$ to support us. Well, its over 100 degrees outside and I know I should be doing something but I do not feel like it. I'm going to go chow down on some strawberries and sugar. Hahahaha.
Sunday, July 5, 2009
The Final Goodbye
Well, this blog is going to be mostly about the reason why I did not want to go on my trip to New Hampshire. If you have not read that blog, its best you do first. If you have, continue.
Well, my grandmother (dad's mom) had gotten weak early in June and was put back in the hospital. I spoke to her before she was taken and seen her once while she was in. After about a week, the doctor discharged her to the Sweetwater Nursing/Rehab to receive rehab to get strong enough to come home. My father did not investigate the place and after a few days there, she got weaker and my father kicked himself in the butt for that and had her readmitted back into the hospital. Then on out, she started to decline. I knew the worse was coming a few weeks before my trip.
Let's just say that this is the grandmother that took care of me and raised me. If we went to school together, she was the short mexican lady that was around from time to time with my brother, JR (not to be mistaken with MJ) and I. She was my little mexican woman that I warned people you do not piss off. I loved her to death.
Well, the Saturday before I left I went to go see her. Her breathing had accelerated but she was not awake. I was told by my father she really was not talking. We had a feeding tube installed a week before because she had not eaten anything. My father told me to go on the trip and that he hopes she will hold out till I get back. Even though I know he was trying to be prepared, he wasn't. Sunday, he had her transported back to his house and had my old room set up for her. Hospice came out to check on her and he gave me updates about any changes.
Tuesday, June 30 in the morning my father calls me to let me know that grandma had opened her eyes and was talking a bit. I got to talk to her on the phone and told her I was on my way and I should be there shortly. It did not dawn on me till that evening about 10 mintues before my father's second call of the day. The other days he only called me once, but I realized she had a rebound. That once final chance before it dropped. My father had called me to let me know she had passed. I did let it out at the end of the call and for a few minutes but then my body shifted to adrenalyn mode and wanted to get home NOW!!!!! I travelled from middle of Tennessee to Arkansas till my mother made me stop. I know I couldn't do anything now but I was already upset I wasn't there. She left me......We feel that she may have suffered a stroke at home and just never told us. She was stubborned that way. Did not want people to take care of her but loved to take care of her family.
Well, we had the viewing on Thursday and she looked the best then she had the past few months. My father and I regreted that we were not really there in her final days. As I write this now....I guess it still hasn't dawned on me. She won't be there at her apartment anymore for me to call and check up on her. To come visit her from time to time. God may have decided it was her time, but I don't feel like it was. I am not ready. I am the strongest one so far since my youngest brother is the most sensitive and my father is just the silent type. I am still continuing on with my life but if I am left alone for my mind to wonder.......I am breaking down. Why her? Why now??? Now I understand how some of you all you have lost loved ones feel. I only have grandparent on my mother's side who remain.
It was a gravesite ceremony and I appreciate all those who showed and offered sympothy. I really broke down when they closed the casket to take the cemetary and when I was staring at the coffin. What else am I going to do? I cared for her the most and I was her baby. We still have to go and pack up the apartment and I am not prepared for that. I may have said the final good bye but I am not ready to let go. Again, I am still continuing on with my life and spending time with my husband. I do feel though that she also let go because she knew I was taken care of. I have found someone that she loved and knew would take care of me since she couldn't. We will be making a trip back in October and getting her a border around her and her husband's plot. She had been wanting that for years and just couldn't afford it but we will be doing it ourselves. Each day, I will take easily and just continue on. However, I feel like I will continue to break down as each day passes and I know its true that she is gone forever.
I love you grandma and I am so sorry that I was not here before you passed. I really wanted to be here and wished you would have held on one more day but then again I did not want you to suffer. Please watch over us as we still need you.
Ofelia Torres: 10/24/26 - 6/30/09
Well, my grandmother (dad's mom) had gotten weak early in June and was put back in the hospital. I spoke to her before she was taken and seen her once while she was in. After about a week, the doctor discharged her to the Sweetwater Nursing/Rehab to receive rehab to get strong enough to come home. My father did not investigate the place and after a few days there, she got weaker and my father kicked himself in the butt for that and had her readmitted back into the hospital. Then on out, she started to decline. I knew the worse was coming a few weeks before my trip.
Let's just say that this is the grandmother that took care of me and raised me. If we went to school together, she was the short mexican lady that was around from time to time with my brother, JR (not to be mistaken with MJ) and I. She was my little mexican woman that I warned people you do not piss off. I loved her to death.
Well, the Saturday before I left I went to go see her. Her breathing had accelerated but she was not awake. I was told by my father she really was not talking. We had a feeding tube installed a week before because she had not eaten anything. My father told me to go on the trip and that he hopes she will hold out till I get back. Even though I know he was trying to be prepared, he wasn't. Sunday, he had her transported back to his house and had my old room set up for her. Hospice came out to check on her and he gave me updates about any changes.
Tuesday, June 30 in the morning my father calls me to let me know that grandma had opened her eyes and was talking a bit. I got to talk to her on the phone and told her I was on my way and I should be there shortly. It did not dawn on me till that evening about 10 mintues before my father's second call of the day. The other days he only called me once, but I realized she had a rebound. That once final chance before it dropped. My father had called me to let me know she had passed. I did let it out at the end of the call and for a few minutes but then my body shifted to adrenalyn mode and wanted to get home NOW!!!!! I travelled from middle of Tennessee to Arkansas till my mother made me stop. I know I couldn't do anything now but I was already upset I wasn't there. She left me......We feel that she may have suffered a stroke at home and just never told us. She was stubborned that way. Did not want people to take care of her but loved to take care of her family.
Well, we had the viewing on Thursday and she looked the best then she had the past few months. My father and I regreted that we were not really there in her final days. As I write this now....I guess it still hasn't dawned on me. She won't be there at her apartment anymore for me to call and check up on her. To come visit her from time to time. God may have decided it was her time, but I don't feel like it was. I am not ready. I am the strongest one so far since my youngest brother is the most sensitive and my father is just the silent type. I am still continuing on with my life but if I am left alone for my mind to wonder.......I am breaking down. Why her? Why now??? Now I understand how some of you all you have lost loved ones feel. I only have grandparent on my mother's side who remain.
It was a gravesite ceremony and I appreciate all those who showed and offered sympothy. I really broke down when they closed the casket to take the cemetary and when I was staring at the coffin. What else am I going to do? I cared for her the most and I was her baby. We still have to go and pack up the apartment and I am not prepared for that. I may have said the final good bye but I am not ready to let go. Again, I am still continuing on with my life and spending time with my husband. I do feel though that she also let go because she knew I was taken care of. I have found someone that she loved and knew would take care of me since she couldn't. We will be making a trip back in October and getting her a border around her and her husband's plot. She had been wanting that for years and just couldn't afford it but we will be doing it ourselves. Each day, I will take easily and just continue on. However, I feel like I will continue to break down as each day passes and I know its true that she is gone forever.
I love you grandma and I am so sorry that I was not here before you passed. I really wanted to be here and wished you would have held on one more day but then again I did not want you to suffer. Please watch over us as we still need you.
Ofelia Torres: 10/24/26 - 6/30/09
Trip
Well, guess I now have some time to post this. This is going to be mostly the trip my mother and I made to pick up my sister-in-law. My brother, MJ, got married back in late April and then later on deployed overseas. His wife, freshly out of high school, is basically new to this military life and out on her own. My husband and I hope to help her get some sense about finances and to not get carried away when she sees the paychecks. We also hope she can get a gripe of living on her own and get a life. But I will update as that goes on. He should return sometime in December.
On June 27, my mother and I left Texas and was on our way to Seabrook, NH. We made it around Jackson, TN and stopped for the night. June 28, ee got up early and was on the road where we drove on I-40, then got off on I-81 and went through Virginia, West Virginia, Maryland, and into Pennsylvania. Man, nobody told me how bad the fog could get in the mountains in Pennsylvania but we stopped around 2AM (EST). We got up on Monday, June 29, and experienced nature by seeing baby rabbits and humminbirds. Oh, I have to tell you that my mother and I love the laughing cow cheese. The ones in the small circles, they are awesome!!! Try them. Well, we were only 5 hours away and made it to Seabrook, NH after noon and stayed for like an hour and half before making our way back to Texas. We stopped back in Scanton, PA and stayed a nice hotel for three women and a female feline. I hated to rush them out of there by June 30, but just had to get as far as we can. Basically, due to an emergency call I received (will talk in the next blog) I tried to get us to Texas that evening, well the next morning. However my mother stopped me at 3AM outside of Little Rock. I only got a few hours sleep but allowed them to stay sleeping for another few hours. We got back in Abilene around 5PM Wed, July 1.
I have to say it was a fun trip with my mother and getting to spend more time with her, but I wished it was longer and we had more time. Again, I was pushed for time and I hated the fact I kind of went as well. Again, read the next blog (or it will be the first blog) to find out. I do have to say that I will never go back to New York. Too many rude people and I can't stand rude people. If we were to move, it will either be Colorado, Tennessee, Flordia, maybe Indiana (or Ohio) or just stay in Texas.
On June 27, my mother and I left Texas and was on our way to Seabrook, NH. We made it around Jackson, TN and stopped for the night. June 28, ee got up early and was on the road where we drove on I-40, then got off on I-81 and went through Virginia, West Virginia, Maryland, and into Pennsylvania. Man, nobody told me how bad the fog could get in the mountains in Pennsylvania but we stopped around 2AM (EST). We got up on Monday, June 29, and experienced nature by seeing baby rabbits and humminbirds. Oh, I have to tell you that my mother and I love the laughing cow cheese. The ones in the small circles, they are awesome!!! Try them. Well, we were only 5 hours away and made it to Seabrook, NH after noon and stayed for like an hour and half before making our way back to Texas. We stopped back in Scanton, PA and stayed a nice hotel for three women and a female feline. I hated to rush them out of there by June 30, but just had to get as far as we can. Basically, due to an emergency call I received (will talk in the next blog) I tried to get us to Texas that evening, well the next morning. However my mother stopped me at 3AM outside of Little Rock. I only got a few hours sleep but allowed them to stay sleeping for another few hours. We got back in Abilene around 5PM Wed, July 1.
I have to say it was a fun trip with my mother and getting to spend more time with her, but I wished it was longer and we had more time. Again, I was pushed for time and I hated the fact I kind of went as well. Again, read the next blog (or it will be the first blog) to find out. I do have to say that I will never go back to New York. Too many rude people and I can't stand rude people. If we were to move, it will either be Colorado, Tennessee, Flordia, maybe Indiana (or Ohio) or just stay in Texas.
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
Back
Well my sister-in-law, Amy, is now in Texas from New Hampshire. She will be here till December. It will write about it later. Also more about the update on my grandmother. Let's just say it did not go as my father and I had hope.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)