Day 12....

Today, Kolton is 12 days old. I still can't believe that Andrew and I created him and he is ours. There are times I still do not believe that I have a child, but when I look at him I know there is nobody else in the world I would love. Then I would look at my insurance claims and its still something to help me remember that day. Sorry that may sound bad but a $16K hospital bill does open an eye since I have never had a bill like that in my life.

I may as well replay how the day May 7th occured. Figured I might as well since it is still slightly fresh in my mind and I would like to come back and remind myself of that day. Andrew and I woke up at 4:30AM. He was able to get some sleep but I had trouble all night due to my nerves. Its amazing what nerves could overcome when you take a sleeping pill and drank a little of a margarita (doctor's orders, seriously). I was debating if I should take a shower or not but in the long run, I just did not have the energy to do it. We loaded up and drove to Regional about 5:15AM to be there and checked in by 5:30AM. I have to say that the IV they had to put in was a killer since she had to stab me twice. The doctor didn't show up till around 7AM and they rolled me down to the OR by 7:30AM. I was way to anxious before than that I was about to walk myself down to the room to get it done and over with.

When we got there, the anesthesiologist did a spinal tap and I have to say that hurt like a b**** as well because he kept pressing on the bone of my spine that tends to rotate and it is very tender in that area. I fought the pain and I have to say the numb feeling that you start to feel is very uncomfortable. Also didn't help that the anxiety was building even more. Andrew came in before the doctor started the c-section but they took my glasses away. I cannot see without my glasses and I know Andrew was getting nervous as well. He mentioned it looked like they were playing tug of war on my belly but I really did not feel anything. I just hated the feeling when they had to press Kolton down to get out and the feel of the anesthesia was weighing down on my chest that sometimes it was hard to breath. After about 5 minutes, we heard the cries. They pulled the drap down so we can see but again, I did not have my glasses on so I really could not see him that well. Just a blueish, reddish blog with dark top. Andrew went over to cut the cord and got to see him and hold him first (punk). He brought him over to show me him but still really could not see him that well.

Andrew followed Kolton over to the nursery while the doctors finished up with me and rolled me over to the recovery room. Andrew mentioned that he got to change Kolton's first diaper because he made the accident as soon as he got to the nursery. Andrew showed him off to the grandparents and saw tears in the grandmother's eyes. It wasn't till I was in recovery that I got to finally see and hold him.

It took like another 45min-1 hour till I was actually in my room and could finally see my family. I just know that I was glad the hard part was over with and that we could finally start the new chapter in our lives.

Andrew cannot wait till Kolton is a little older and stronger so he could play with him but till then he must be patient. I do not know what to do when his nonna (Andrew's mother) leaves on Monday to return to Florida but I figured I can handle it. Andrew is going to try to get additional time off to help around and get a routine going for me started since once he returns to work, he'll be gone for 6 days and it will be just Kolton and I.

I am down to the final 2 weeks of this term for school and will have a week off before starting the next term. Part of me wants to pull back from school just till I return back to work and we get back on our feet financially but I am afraid I might not return for a while if I do that. I am still clueless on what to do about school but hopefully something will come through.

Well, this is all I can think of at this moment. Trust me, I'm trying to update all on our newest addition and taking as many pictures as I can.